Merry Christmas Captain Scheunemann This  is the 23rd of  November--in the Titanic year 1912.  The old sailing schooner Rouse Simmons is homeward bound, from Thompson, Michigan, with its deck cargo of evergreens.  Ice and snow are frosting the evergreen cargo. CAPTAIN HERMAN SCHUENEMANN:   As soon as you boys finish lollygagging on the pumps break out the paint barrel. I want this store to look sharp when we get to downtown Chicago. A LOW VOICE FROM THE CREW:  I'm getting off at Two Rivers. CAP:  Quit growling. And send that idle carpenter to sound the water in the hold.  Give us a song boys! SAILOR'S CHORUS: Oh Christmas tree, Oh Christmas tree... LOW VOICE:  We should be pitching them trees overboard. CAP:   Touch those trees and you touch my life!   I suppose that this trip don't mean nothing to you sailors, but what we are doing here will brighten the lives of  Chicago kids who maybe never see an evergreen.  To a kid, this cargo seems to come from the North Pole.  Stick around on the docks when we're showing off these trees, and watch their little eyes light up.  It would melt the heart of a brass Napoleon! LOW VOICE:  The Lake is winning. CAP:  Pump and pump and sing and sing boys!  These patent pumps will keep you warm. LOW VOICE:  Warm?  If in heaven we don't meet, hand in hand we'll face the heat! CHORUS: Oh Christmas tree, Oh Christmas tree, How faithful are thy branches! LOW VOICE:  Let's rush for the yawl boat. CHORUS:  O Tannenbaum, O Tannenbaum, Wie treu sind deine Blaetter! CAP:   Pump!  This is a business, my wife keeps telling me, and then the city kids get on board, and she is cooking meals for them! LOW VOICE:  Hey, I know a gal in Two Rivers.   CAP:  Where's my carpenter--? The End